Stress is universal. Everyone experiences it at some point, although the intensity and frequency can vary – kind of like waves in the ocean. Sometimes the waves are gentle and manageable, whereas other times they come crashing down and knock you off your feet. In fact, a significant portion of adults report feeling stressed regularly.

What Causes Stress?

Stress can come from multiple sources, both external and internal. Some of the most common causes of stress include: 

1. Work and Career Pressures 

Heavy workloads, long hours, job insecurity, and workplace conflicts contribute significantly to stress levels. The pressure to perform and meet expectations can lead to burnout if not managed properly.

2. Financial Struggles

Money is one of the top stressors for individuals and families. The rising cost of living, unexpected expenses, debt, and job instability can create constant anxiety.

3. Relationships and Social Expectations

Conflicts with family, friends, or romantic partners can be emotionally exhausting. Additionally, social media and societal pressures can lead to feelings of inadequacy and stress about how one is perceived.

4. Health Concerns

Dealing with personal health issues or caring for an ill loved one can be emotionally and physically draining. The uncertainty of medical conditions often leads to heightened stress. 

5. Major Life Changes

Even positive life changes—such as getting married, having a child, or moving to a new city—can be stressful. Change brings uncertainty, which the brain often perceives as a threat.

6. Everyday Hassles

Traffic jams, last-minute deadlines, unexpected delays, and even decision fatigue can contribute to daily stress levels. These may seem minor, but over time, they accumulate and impact well-being.

How Stress Affects Your Health 

The body’s response to stress is rooted in survival. When faced with a threat, the brain signals the release of stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline, preparing you for a “fight-or-flight” response. While helpful in short bursts, prolonged exposure to stress hormones can have negative effects: 

• Physical Health: Chronic stress weakens the immune system, making you more susceptible to illnesses. It can also contribute to high blood pressure, heart disease, digestive issues, headaches, and sleep disturbances.
• Mental Health: Long-term stress is linked to anxiety, depression, irritability, and difficulty concentrating. It can also lead to unhealthy coping mechanisms like overeating, substance abuse, or social withdrawal.
• Emotional Well-being: Constant stress can make it difficult to feel joy or relaxation, leading to emotional exhaustion and burnout.

How Stress Impacts Relationships 

Stress doesn’t just affect you—it spills over into your relationships as well. When overwhelmed, you may: 

• Become irritable or short-tempered with loved ones. 
• Withdraw emotionally, making it harder to connect. 
• Struggle with communication, leading to misunderstandings and conflicts. 
• Feel too drained to invest time in relationships, leading to feelings of neglect from partners, friends, or family members. 

Chronic stress can create a cycle where personal relationships become another source of stress rather than a source of support.

Managing Stress Before It Manages You 

While stress is inevitable, it doesn’t have to control your life. Here are some ways to manage it effectively: 

1. Identify Triggers – Understanding what causes your stress helps you take proactive steps to reduce or cope with it. 
2. Prioritize Self-Care – Regular exercise, healthy eating, and adequate sleep help build resilience against stress. 
3. Practice Mindfulness – Activities like meditation, deep breathing, and journaling can help calm the nervous system. 
4. Set Boundaries – Learn to say “no” and create space for rest. Overcommitting leads to burnout. 
5. Seek Support – Talking to a friend, family member, or therapist can provide relief and perspective. 
6. Engage in Relaxing Activities – Hobbies, nature walks, or listening to music can provide a mental reset.

So, now what? 

Stress is a normal part of life, but chronic stress shouldn’t be. Recognizing its sources and effects can help you take control before it negatively impacts your health, happiness, and relationships. Small daily actions can make a significant difference in how you manage stress and improve your overall well-being. 

If anything in this blog hit close to home and your stress is becoming overwhelming, don’t hesitate to reach out for support. Your well-being is worth prioritizing.

The post Understanding Stress: Why It Happens and How It Affects Your Life appeared first on Sarahgabriel.

Let’s begin the tour. Shall we?

1. The Front Door (also known as “aka” The Warning Signs)

As you approach the house, you notice the front door. The door is weathered, hard to push open, and creaks ominously. It hints that something isn’t quite right. You hesitate but walk in anyway, as you brush off the exhaustion, irritability, and constant feeling of being “on edge”. We know something is off, but we tell ourselves “its fine…I’m fine”. So we ignore off the signs and enter.

2. The Living Room (aka Emotional Exhaustion)

Once you enter through the front door, you look to your left to find the living room. The once-cozy space is now cluttered and dimly lit. The couch is worn out, and you sink into it. You feel like you can’t get up. This is where the emotional exhaustion sets in—you’re drained, overwhelmed, and the thought of doing anything feels monumental. You continue to trek along, but everything feels heavier than before. But hey “It’s fine….I’m fine”, right?

3. The Kitchen (aka Physical Symptoms)

You find yourself walking through the living room trying not to trip over things on the floor. You look ahead to find the kitchen. The kitchen is a mess – pure chaos. The sink is full of dishes and there is dirt all over the floor.  The fridge is empty except for the leftovers you don’t want, or random things that you cannot make anything with anyways. Your appetite is off – you’re either always seeking some kind of meal or you have no desire to eat anything. Maybe whatever is in the kitchen is convenient, but not the best choice. The lack of nourishment represents headaches, muscle tension, back pain, or stomach issues that arise when stress takes a toll on your body. The pain seems to never leave. Its there when you wake up, go about your day and fall back asleep.

4. The Office (aka Reduced Productivity)

You try to leave the kitchen, so you walk ahead to find an office tucked away in a corner of the house. Papers are scattered everywhere, tasks undone. Multiple books are open, each at a different chapter. The once-organized desk now symbolizes your inability to focus or complete work. The multiple opened books represent the tasks you have started but cannot seem to finish because of the never-ending to-do list. You sit down to start something, but your mind is foggy, and even simple tasks feel overwhelming. You question why its so difficult to remember things or complete things you used to do with ease. Everything is more difficult and weighs much heavier than before. You’re constantly overwhelmed with your exhaustion, so you try to find a place to rest.

5. The Bedroom (aka Sleep Problems)

You find a staircase that leads upstairs, so you decide to go up to find the bedroom. The bed looks inviting, but it’s not a place of rest anymore. Either you can’t fall asleep, you can’t stay asleep, or you wake up feeling just as tired as when you went to bed. The insomnia or restless sleep only deepens your fatigue. You never feel rested and exhaustion seems to loom over you at all times. The lack of sleep begins to add up and you find yourself to be irritable, angry, upset, and maybe emotional. You find it hard to stay calm or regulate yourself. When things quiet for a moment, you find yourself questioning why you exploded earlier. Then you start to think of all the things that need to be done. Great….the never-ending to-do list haunts you in the day and in your dreams.

6. The Bathroom (aka Neglecting Self-Care)

You walk into the bathroom to wash your face and try to freshen up. But the bathroom mirror is fogged over, and the sink is filled with unopened products. The multiple unopened products are all the things you’ve been lacking to give back to yourself. You notice you’ve been skipping showers, meals, and moments to take care of yourself. The reflection feels unfamiliar, as if you’ve lost touch with who you are. You take a moment to ask yourself how you got here…

7. The Basement (aka Cynicism and Detachment)

You decide to walk back downstairs. To your right, you see a door that leads to the basement. Descending into the basement, you find it dark, cold, and isolating. This is where detachment lives. You feel disconnected from others, unmotivated, and sometimes even resentful of the people and responsibilities you used to care about. Everything is cold and distant. You nearly feel numb to it all.

8. The Attic (aka Breakdown Point)

The chill in the basement is too much for you, so you head back upstairs. You hear something upstairs, so you head to the attic. You open the ceiling door to find that the roof is leaking. Rain drips through cracks, symbolizing the breaking point when everything feels overwhelming. You can see holes in the roof that have clearly been deteriorating for some time. How did we get here? How did we let the house worsen to this point? The roof looks like its going to crumble and fall apart. You know the house can no longer protect you, and without some work, it risks collapsing entirely.

But here’s the good news

Every house can be repaired. With rest, support, and care, you can mend the cracks, declutter the spaces, and rebuild a sense of balance. You just need to recognize when it’s time to start the renovation.

So, what does your house look like? Does it need repairs yet? Let’s talk about it.

– Sarah

The post Welcome to the House of Burnout appeared first on Sarahgabriel.

As a caregiver, you are often consumed with “what’s next” and “who needs what”. I’m sure it feels like there isn’t enough time in the day to get everything done. Between keeping up with work, looking after everyone and managing never-ending tasks, you most likely find yourself depleted by the end of the day. Its similar to when your phone battery dwindles down to 10%. Whether you’re a caregiver on a personal level, professional level or both, this blog is for you. The exhaustion that you feel is an understatement because of how deep it can be felt on a physical, emotional, and mental level. Caregiving can take a toll on you on multiple levels, and it can accumulate overtime which leaves you feeling heavy, burnt out and overwhelmed.

Caregivers will often say that they don’t have time to look after themselves. When I ask caregivers to tell me about ways they look after themselves, I usually hear things like “with what time?” or “when?”.  But its true – how can you if your days are filled with endless tasks for other people. Time flies before your eyes. Before you know it, another week or month has gone by and you continue to feel drained, stuck and depleted.

But a car can’t run on an empty tank, and neither can you.

You cannot continue to dismiss your own needs while giving you whole self to others. I know that it can be easier to just keep trekking along and doing what you’re doing, but you’ll leave yourself feeling burnt out. Burnout can look like many things including, feeling numb, irritable, overwhelmed, drained, unmotivated, cynical, resentful, and exhausted on all levels. Does this sound familiar? If it does, keep reading.

So what now? Where do you start? Where do you go from here?

You start with checking in with yourself. Take a moment to ask yourself “how am I feeling?” and then ask “what do I need?”. You need to add yourself into the equation of life. You are just as important as all of the people you care for on a daily basis. And if we’re being honest, you need to look after yourself in order to look after everyone. There is a reason we hear “please put on your oxygen mask before helping the person beside you”. Making time to check in with yourself throughout the day allows you to pause for a moment, reflect on how you feel and then allow yourself to give your body what it needs. Maybe you need to take a break, eat a snack, go to the bathroom, take a moment alone or vent to a friend. The main purpose of these check-ins is to make time to look after yourself in the midst of a day full of constantly caring for others.

Then, the next step is to ask yourself “what brings me joy?” or “what do I miss doing that was just for me?”. Maybe it’s as simple as going out with a friend, catching up on a good book, or sitting in the bath. This step involves incorporating yourself into the day or week more often. It helps you to reflect on what brings you joy, and then scheduling it into your day. Looking after yourself doesn’t have to be fancy – it just needs to suit you and your needs.

By now you should have built in check-ins into your day and created a list of things that bring you joy back into your schedule. The third step is to create and implement boundaries.

This means carving out time in the day to do something for you. It also means protecting that time for you. It’s more than just asking yourself “what do I need?”. It’s following through and giving yourself a break of some sort. Implementing boundaries can be uncomfortable, but that’s because it’s a new or unfamiliar concept that you may not be used to. Boundaries can look like saying “no, I can’t do that”, “I’m not available”, “I can help with that tomorrow” or “my plate is too full”. Building boundaries will allow you to protect your time and energy instead of constantly giving it away.

Before you think “this is never going to work”,  just remember that Rome wasn’t built in a day. I know you’re probably thinking this plan is a waste of time, but that’s because your body and mind have gotten used to you neglecting yourself.  You need to start somewhere. Let this be your start.

From your fellow caregiver,

Sarah

The post Who cares for the Caregiver? appeared first on Sarahgabriel.

What I am trying to say is that self-care can be simple. You need to look after yourself. It is imperative that you make time for yourself and that you add yourself into the equation of life. In a world that values constant productivity at a consistent pace, we have been trained to keep moving, to keep going and to keep working. Self-care is not meant to be this monumental thing. It is meant to replenish your soul and refuel your energy. Self-care is a necessity in maintaining your physical, emotional and mental well-being.

We have also been trained to think that self-care and rest is not productive. We have been taught that self-care is counter productive. However, this is not true as you cannot pour from an empty cup. You cannot drive on an empty tank and you cannot bloom if you’re not rooted in good soil.

When we neglect caring for ourselves, this can lead to stress, illness and burnout. These aspects take over our ability to function at 100%.  Instead of thinking of self-care as a luxury, consider it to be preservation or sustenance of one’s self. Your body requires more than just water, food and sleep. It also requires self-care, recognizing your worth and ensuring you have the energy and clarity to face life’s challenges.

Think about this: You wouldn’t let your phone battery die; you wouldn’t let your car gas tank run on empty; you wouldn’t ignore a smoke alarm; nor would you keep running on a sprained or injured ankle. So why is it that we let our self care take the back burner?

Self-care is not a complicated process, and it consists of small steps we can take to ensure we are properly taking care of our physical, mental and emotional health. Sometimes self-care can be going to the spa, but sometimes it can also mean having a bath at home with your favourite candle and essential oils. Maybe self-care is curling up on the couch with a good book and a cup of tea. Or even cancelling plans that you never really wanted to attend? (where are my introverts at?).

If you’re unsure of how to start on the self-care journey or what to try, here is a short list of self-care ideas:

• Going for walks
• Blasting your favourite song/playlist
• Taking a lunch break from work (like actually taking a lunch break)
• Practicing mindfulness
• Reading a book
• Going outdoors and getting some fresh air
• Planning a getaway (to a nearby city or somewhere further away)
• Organizing or cleaning up a space that you’ve been neglecting
• Listening to a podcast
• Learning something new
• Connecting with nature
• Meditating
• Taking a relaxing shower or bath (candles, scented oils, music, bubbles, etc)
• Taking some time to zone out
• Pamper yourself
• Practicing gratitude
• Put your phone away (I promise the messages will be there when you go back to it)
• Getting creative (arts, music, etc)
• Connecting with people you love
• Gaining more sleep or practicing good sleep hygiene
• Getting your hair or nails done
• Celebrating silence
• Cooking a favourite recipe or trying a new one (or the complete opposite – ordering in because you deserve a night off from cooking)
• Sitting in the sunshine and feeling the warmth on your skin (my favourite)
• Going for a massage (use those benefits if you have them!)

Self-care isn’t limited to what I mentioned above. Self-care is anything that brings you joy and feeds your soul. The purpose in self-care is to carve out time for you. So take some time after reading this to ask yourself “what brings me joy?” or “what do I miss doing that was just for me?” Write down some ideas, and then fit them into your schedule.

Stop feeling guilty for engaging in self-care or looking after yourself from a world that was never set up to look after you to begin with.  

And remember, self-care isn’t a luxury – it’s a necessity. Rest is not a reward – it’s a right. You deserve it.

• Sarah

The post Why Self-Care is a necessity, not a luxury appeared first on Sarahgabriel.